Six Unbelievably Useless, Tacky Holiday Gifts

I have not done one of these gift idea lists for a long time. I’ve missed you, random blog post! I know other websites (read: Gawker.com et. al.) are coming out with their own Year End Lists.  Here’s mine.  For you and yours: the worst-est (yet, somehow brilliant) Christmas gifts you can buy someone online.

(Clicking on all pictures will take you to a purchase link. You’re welcome.)

1.)   For the hated golfer in your life:  Camouflage Golf Balls

Avid golfers will actually HOPE that their balls end up in the sand trap...

I would give this gift to a golfer who brags endlessly about their game/stroke play.  Let them stay at the first hole for a good, long while.  Heck, with their luck… you may not see them for a few days.

Let me hear you say HALLELUJAH!

2.)  For the Pet Lover in your life: Humping Dog Flashdrives

Your “dog,” in addition to humping your leg, can now make love to your computer’s USB port.   Because you can’t embarrass holiday company enough…   And BONUS!  You can discuss the birds and the bees with your kids during the most special time of the year…

DO IT!!!! Back UP that file of yours!!!   Oh Yeah...

3.)  For the Sports-Obsessed Jerk in your life:  The Protoast Toaster

POP POP GOES THE... Fleur-de-lis?!?!???

POP POP GOES THE... Fleur-de-lis?!?!???

Do you know anyone that even OWNS a toaster?  Be a doll and give one to them… so that they can have breakfast with their favorite sports team (eh, logo)
.

4.)  So we don’t leave out our Jewish friends…

This brilliance  made me spit up...

5.)  For our (almost) geriatric “friends…” eh… acquaintances:

(Because carrying around a conspicuous box of tighty-whitees makes more sense than, you know… having a spare set of ‘roos handy.)

6.)  And finally, for someone you really, truly hate.  Submitted without commentary.

A toilet teapot. Discuss amongst yourselves.

Advertisements

About No Disrespect

A little schmuck in a big world
This entry was posted in Happy Happy!, Holiday Gifts, Holidays, Holy Cow, Naughty!, Oh The Humanity!, Six Things I Learned This Week and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Six Unbelievably Useless, Tacky Holiday Gifts

  1. Roxanne says:

    Those were hilarious! I personally like the dog USB!!

    PS: I’ll be sharing this for my post on Tuesday make sure to drop by and visit.

  2. Pingback: Six… er… SEVEN Things I Want for Christmas |

  3. Pingback: But Being Bad Just Feels So Good « Love.Love.Love.

What do ya have to say, suckas?!?!???

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s